11:56 p.m. - Monday, Oct. 03, 2016
New friends
Had a lovely weekend. Really just lovely and peaceful with good company. Saturday I went shopping and found shoes that fit and are comfortable and stylish! So pleased because I hate shopping trips. It's exhausting, I only ever feel like it once every two years and splash out on loads of things at once. Amazing to me that some people buy clothes every month. I never see anything I like unless it's really expensive - that's why I want to learn how to make my own clothes. After I was done with shopping I msgd the Mexican to see if he wanted to hang out. He was stoned and watching Star Trek (the movie, he's not some Trekkie Nerd he made a point of stating) so I went round to dump my shopping and have a smoke. We went out for Nachos and beer, I was a little concerned about bumping into people from work because tongues will wag but I don't care what anybody thinks right? We went back to smoke at his and Youtube music and shit, show and tell stuff. He suggested watching a movie but then we would have had to have laid on his bed together. Far too intimate, would have made me very nervous. So I said I wouldn't be able to get through a movie. Anyway, l like talking. It's bound to happen sooner or later. I really don't want him to make a move, I sit next to him for 40 hours of the week. I think he knows not to shit where you eat though.
He showed me his pop up book collection and some attempts he has made himself. He's very sweet and sensitive I think underneath the tough Mexican exterior. At least he's more interesting than The Boy. You know someone is good for you if you come away after spending time feeling somehow nourished and bigger. The boy just made me feel pathetic, unimportant and diminished and old.
Sunday I met up with the Catholic girl from Yorkshire for a picnic in Retiro Park. It was so great to talk to a fellow English girl, plus she's from Yorkshire so she's extra great. We seem to suffer from the same anxieties so we bonded over that. It felt like a therapy session with lots of laughter. We are going to plan some day trips together. Bless her, she said she wasn't sure about texting me but I told her she totally saved me that day from absolute despair which pleased her! It's amazing how forgetting about The Boy and removing him from my weekends has allowed two genuinely lovely people into my life. It just goes to show how important it is to clear toxic people away because they are blocking the pathway for new potential friendships.
Uff, today l gave some attitude to my supervisor which was bad timing because today was the day I was planning on asking for a payrise. Why am l such a dick?! I keep self sabotaging. Anyway, she did talk down to me which l cannot stand. I plan to talk to her tomorrow and tell her l don't appreciate it and "can I have a payrise?"
